Emotion At Last

I haven't felt such vivacity in a long time. The last few weeks of summer, I was secretly fearing that I had turned into that type of coral, the one that is heartless, and that a certain someone once told me I resembled.  I was feeling completely indifferent to a multitude of scenarios. Times where I believed a hurricane of emotions would be a more appropriate reaction. But this weekend, today in-particular, I felt so alive. Pity, emptiness, resistance to change, loneliness, cold, warmth, comfort, love, achievement, calm, hope, admiration, excitement for the future, innocence, it all comes together to form quite the rush. As far as sadness goes, it really shouldn't be avoided as much as we attempt to steer clear of it. It is the most powerful emotion our vulnerable human selves can produce, and its very healthy to practice it to a dull extent once in a while. The safety of sadness though, is if you are strong enough to know how to overcome it when you so desire. Then, you have the will to enjoy it for what its worth. 

So, Phoebe is currently living on the peak of a hill overlooking the Amherst farms. What a strange, foreign world college is. I drove the whole hour and a half home from Umass. Along the way, I came inches away from turning a baby turkey into road kill. I'm sorry for scaring you turkey family, but I knew the entire time that your baby was going to be safe. In my mind, and body too I suppose, I have complete control and confidence in handling the large clunky vehicle I am driving. My mother is not so sure about this control. Maybe she is right, who knows. 

Joey Hersh has the best house on the planet. His family only adds to the warmth and the welcome. I hope you realize how lucky you are, boi. 

And now I am going to go listen to Two Headed Boy Part II on repeat until I fall asleep. Miss you Pheebs.